i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Randomize
