1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
