she kept yelling 'call me bella'
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
