I wannas sexs uuuuu
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
then he tried to convert me to islam
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
I have tasted many bathrooms
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO???
COSTCO IS MAGICAL
I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.
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