why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
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