Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
Randomize