Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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