your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
