Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
My vagina is very pro this idea
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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