Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Randomize
