1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Randomize
