You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
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