i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Randomize
