WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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