He is an equal opportunity slut.
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize
