i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
Randomize
