my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Randomize
