Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
