So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize