i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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