I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Randomize
