I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
