is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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