A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
We have started to decorate penises.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
