i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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