The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Randomize