Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Randomize
