Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
