dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
Randomize
