My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
We just shotgunned beers for America
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
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