I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
So much Jack, so little girl.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
