Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize