OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Randomize
