if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
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