So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
no you cant smoke seaweed
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
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