nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
I just blew my weed a kiss
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
Randomize
