3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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