i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
Randomize
