I love black thongs
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
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