Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
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