i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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