then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
