Sober January is a disaster.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
