I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Randomize
