Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
