can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
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