Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
Randomize
