Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
Found your dick twin last night
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Randomize
