So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
I don't think brook has ever known best
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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