Duck Duck Cougar?
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
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