i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize
