There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
I understand Curling. That high.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
Randomize